Critics

I've grown fond of watching the show, "Top Chef." I started with the last season in New York, I've continued to watch the "Top Chef: Masters," and am looking forward to this upcoming season in Las Vegas. One of the things that has been more noticeable is the role of the food critics. For those unfamiliar with the show, these well-known food critics evaluate and rate the food that is prepared by the chefs. Everyone is familiar with all the other food critics who may write reviews for your local paper or even magazines.

Anyways, as I watched this show, I realized something: Critics really annoy me! I'm going to throw film critics in here as well. Sure, they serve their purpose, and one could argue that they are needed. However, I would question how much they can really relate with normal society. While there is nothing wrong with being an eloquent writer and possessing a grandiose vocabulary, one could question if that's really necessary in describing food. With "Top Chef" it seems like these writers are trying to impress viewers with how detailed they can describe food and breakout colorful synonyms for the food's consistency, but we're all wondering one thing: was the food good? Why this rant, you may ask? Here's the thing, I know good food, I'm extremely passionate about food, and I like to talk about food, but I'll never be a food critic. Why? Because I'm not a great writer (maybe not even a good writer). So why should writing Hemingway-esque reviews of restaurants matter? I don't know. Apparently, someone somewhere decided that restaurant reviews should be so colorful that no one could read the black-and-white: did you like the restaurant? Many of these critics write/speak with such arrogance about food and restaurants that you might think they were once chefs, but the profession bored them. I tend to think that they weren't quite good enough to write novels so they settled for writing about food. Film critics are exactly the same. There's no need to only give good reviews to independent movies and completely ignore big blockbusters. I don't care what a film critic thinks, I'm going to listen to people I know, not some moron who probably wears an ascot to the movie theater.

This leads me to my next point. Have you ever seen a job opening for a food critic? Before you go surfing on Monster or Craigslist, know this, you won't find anything. No one is looking for a food critic, but they should be. They should be looking for someone who doesn't attempt to impress people with words but attempts to tell the diner about the restaurant itself. What did the food taste like, how was the service, were there a bunch of people taking doggie bags out, etc.

Critics, don't try to garner some great book deal with your local reviews. Remember, you're not a chef, you can't cook as good as one, otherwise you would have a restaurant. I hate seeing chefs stutter around critics and lower their head as they receive a bad review. While reviews are necessary, critics need to get off their high horse and realize they aren't better than everyone just because they didn't have to apply for their job. It most likely fell in their lap.

Author's note: I do believe that there are some good food critics out there, not a lot, just some. I'd love to hear their opinion of the growing popularity of sites like Yelp where "regulars" can provide reviews of restaurants.